Some Good News ... at last

Had my chemo yesterday and my doctor has decided that he would count the first chemo I had in November and that yesterday's chemo would be the last of my "hard" ones.  I am so relieved.  Also, as a precaution, because I can't get past the Tuesday "down" day, he is having me come in next Tuesday and they will do blood tests and if I need fluids or anything else, they will do it there and possibly avoid another hospital stay.  Then, March 1st I start my last round of chemo which will be 12 weeks, one time per week.  They said it is a lighter chemo and hopefully I will be able to tolerate that well.  You know, I think I'm seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.

You know, it's funny how your mind works.  How it can go through your brain and pick up random things that you haven't thought about in 20-30 years!  What I'm getting at is that the other night I woke up out of a dead sleep and had the words to a verse in the Helen Reddy "I Am Woman" song.  And it fit my current situation so perfectly.  The words were "You can bend, but never break me, cuz it only serves to make, more determined to achieve my final goal.  And I'll come back even stronger, not a novice any longer,  Cuz you've deepened the conviction in my soul."  That is exactly how I feel, I have been bent, but I'm not broken and I am more than determined to get through this and I WILL come back strong ... that conviction is in the bottom of my soul.  But isn't that strange that that particular verse would wake me from a sound sleep?  Hmmmm.   Well, thank you for listening to me ramble .... I thank God for each and every one of you supporters ... You've been with me from the beginning of this journey ... you're the best.

I Just Can't Get Past Tuesdays ...

Well, just when I think things are going well, Tuesday comes along.  Last Tuesday the fever came again ... this time 100.7 and we called the care line at Regions and were instructed to come down.  So, at 9:00 at night we get in the car and drive 2 hours to the Emergency Room.  At this point I can hardly walk without having to stop and rest and I have no voice at all.  They found an infection ... Bladder ... again.  The worst part was that my white blood count was at 200 ( should be between 4,000 and 10,000) to be normal.  They told me I needed to be on antibiotics to fight the infection.  Well, of course, this scared me because it was the antiiotics that caused kidney failure the last time.  They said if I went home without antibiotics an infection could rage through my body very quickly because I had nothing to fight it off and it would be hard to control an infection if it got through my body.  So, after praying and talking with doctors, the decision was made to go on the antibiotics.  I had to stay at the hospital so I could have frequent blood tests to be sure there was no reaction and that the kidneys were functioning properly.  Well, not only was my blood count at 200, but my hemoglobin was 6.3, so I needed to have a blood transfusion to bring that up.  I was put in a sort of isolation because of how low everything was.  I gradually started feeling better and the trip across the room to the bathroom didn't require a four hour nap.  On Friday, the blood count went up to 2,800 and my hemoglobin was 8.3 and my kidneys were tolerating the antibiotics very well and they let me go home.  Spent the night at Erin's house and we came back to Cloquet on Saturday.  Next Tuesday, the 15th, I go in for another round of chemo.  They are going to talk about maybe giving me preventive antibiotics so I won't get a fever and an infection every time.  I am so tired of feeling like a dish rag and being in the hospital, I hope they can find something that will allow me to at least be home.  I sure am glad I only have 2 more of this "hard" chemo before I start the other kind.  Can I ask that you all pray I can get past these Terrible Tuesdays?  Thank you!!!!!

Finding the Joy

God wants us to be happy ... He wants joy in our life and I have made a concious decision to find joy and happiness in every day.  Whether it is a bright blue, cloudless sky, or a one-of-a kind snowflake or maybe a day when I feel better than the day before.  There is so much to be thankful for and find joy in.  Today my joy was in spending time with my bestest brother and sweetest sister-in-law and loving husband.  Diane brought a whole yummy lunch with dessert (spaghetti, bread and apple pie) and then we played some cards.  How much loved ones mean to us.

I had my treatment last Tuesday (2/1) and it went very well.  Another joy ... my white blood count which had been at 300 the week before soared to 8,000, right in the middle of the normal range.  I can be sure that I will be feeling fatigued around Sunday, Monday and some of the week, but maybe not as bad as last time.  Tom is monitoring my temperature very closely, but I don't think I'll be in panic mode if I get a little temp this time, now I know what is happening.  I feel I'm tolerating this round of chemo quite well and I only have 2 more rounds of this kind and then I go to a milder chemo treatment.  Albeit ... it's 12 weeks, but not so potent.  Then I will be done with the chemo part!!!!!

Here's wishing all my friends and family out there something to find joy in today and thank you all for your continued support.  LOVE YOU!!!