What a detour!

Well, I am out of the hospital (after 17 days at Regions).  The medicine they gave me in Cloquet for the urinary tract infection I was allergic to.  It caused me to have kidney failure.  I gained 22 pounds in 2 days when Tom brought me down to Regions.  And I hadn't eaten in 3 weeks.  Now that's quite a diet.  I was put on dialysis 5 times and had a blood transfusion.  I was quite sick.  Every day my blood levels and creatin was checked.  My kidneys were functioning at 5%.  The only good thing about a trauma to the kidney is that with prednisone, they will make a complete comeback.  The creatin levels finally started to come down on their own without dialysis and Christmas Eve they let me come home.  It was a good Christmas present to be with family .... and very emotional.  I have to go in to get some blood tests tomorrow and the following week and then an appointment with the kidney dr.  Then an appointment with oncology to start chemo again.  We have to go with a different regimen for that because the first one was toooooo strong.  Can't really start chemo until the kidneys get squared away though.  I want to thank each and every one of you for your kind thoughts, prayers and support.  I couldn't have gone through this without knowing I have so many wonderful people behind me and a God to carry me through .... because this time ... there was not strength of my own.  Love to you all.

Turning a corner ... only it's a wrong one

Well, last week I thought I was turning a corner ...  I did, but it was a wrong turn.  On Wednesday my termperature hit 100.5 ... a dangerous temperature for a chemo patient.  After calling my oncologist he said I was to go immediately to the emergency room in Cloquet.  I did not have time to drive down to the cities.  When all the results came back, my complete bloodcount which an average is 10, mine was 1.  I had no bloodcells to fight infections.  I was put in isolation where everyone who came in (including Tom) had to wear gloves, mask and gown.  I have never been so sick in my life.  I was diagnosed with an Urinary Tract Infection.  I was so ill, I could not keep my food down, so I was throwing up and I hurt everywhere in my body.  I evenually got morphine for the pain.   I stayed in the hospital from Wednesday to Sunday.  At that point I only wanted to come home because I wanted to come home, not because I felt better.  I haven't eaten anything for 10 days, except popsicles.  I did, however, today eat some yogurt.  Not some, but the whole cup.  It took me 2 sittings, but I did it.  I'm so scared because next Monday I'm suppose to have my second chemo treatment.  I honestly don't know if my body can handle it.  I'd sure like to feel a little better first before I start all over again.  Have a call in to the dr. right now.  We'll see what he says.  Please keep those prayers coming ... I sure could use them.

New Week ....

Well, I think I'm going to survive!!  Last week kicked me in the bootie!  I have lists and lists of things to discuss with my Oncologist.  I wrote everything down and maybe next time won't be so bad.  Today I woke up feeling 100% better.  I'm sleeping and I have some energy today.  My blanket and pillow have been my constant companion this past week, but I'm ready to tackle some laundry and start some Christmas baking.  God is good ... He lifts us up and carries us through the times we can't .... I found that out .... the hard way.

Pain, pain, go away .....

Wednesday and Thursday were pretty awful.  The pain was down in my bones.  It was very achy and I tried taking some Tylenol and that would work for a bit.  I'll see if next round of chemo there won't be something I can take for that.  I found I'm not very good at withstanding pain.  Not nearly as "strong" as I thought I could be.  Tears flowed pretty easily yesterday, but you know what?  I slept last night (finally) and the pain has lessened considerably today.  I'm turning the corner ... until next time and maybe next time we can control it a bit.

So, far ... so good

Well, it's Wednesday.  2 days after chemo.  Good news ... no nausea (maybe a bit of queasy now and then, but nothing much).  I am having a little trouble sleeping, but as of today, I don't have to take the steroids until the next round, so maybe that will help with the sleeping.  I am a bit achy, but that's to be expected too.  Nothing I can't handle though.  Glad we are home before the storm hits and we can just put a log in the fireplace and hunker down for the next few days.  I think it will be a few lazy days ahead for us.  That's not a bad thing.  I want to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving and tell you I am thankful for all your love, prayers and support!

One Chemo down ... Five to go!!

Yesterday I had to start taking steroids for three days.  I didn't think much of it.  Went to bed early so that I could have a good night's sleep for my first chemo session.  I was anxious and I will have to admit, I was down right scared.  Scared of the unknown.  Well, at 1:30 a.m., I was still wide awake and had a roaring headache and some nausea.  Nausea!!!!  Was I going to throw up BEFORE treatment?  I got up and took some Tylenol.  Back to bed ... 2:30 .... noonie noo ... still awake!  I got up and went and laid down on the couch.  Well, somewhere around 4:00 a.m., I feel asleep only to have to wake up at six.  We needed to leave early because of the slippery road.  Two hours sleep and I was tired!!!  Got to the hospital at 8:00.  After the blood drawn and the doctor going over the results, we were finally in our room at 10:00 to begin the treatment.  They all went very well and I tolerated them very well also.  I have a lot of nausea medicine to take should I feel sick.  If they don't seem to be working, I'm to call and they will try another kind.  They said there is no reason I should feel sick with all the medications that are available.  Well, anyway, I told the Dr. about my no night of sleep.  Then he told me that a side affect of this steroid is insomnia and anxiety!!!  Also, I will probably have insomnia tonight and tomorrow too.  We are heading home tomorrow to stay ahead of the weather.  Keep those prayers coming because they are certainly working.  I will journal that next few days to see how I feel because these next few days will be exactly what happens after every treatment.  Then I will know what to expect and maybe I can counteract something before it begins.  I let you know how these next few days go!

Hair Today ... Gone Tommorrow (or the next couple of weeks)

Yesterday my daughters and my granddaughter Bre went to It's Still Me in St. Louis Park and had a great time.  It's Still Me is a wig shop where Jan, the owner, is a breast cancer survivor herself and she provides one on one appointments with women who are looking for a wig during their chemo.  We had so much fun!  The girls all had their cameras (and took some shots that they can later use for blackmail) and I tried on a lot of wigs, along with scarves and caps.  The second one I tried on was the one I eventually got.  I am so happy because Jan matched my hair and style so close to my own.  She has given me confidence to face this next hurdle with little trepidation.  We laughed as she put me in short curly wigs, and LONG haired wigs.  Neither style was for me, but gave us some really good laughs.  Then we tried on scarves and hats.  The hats were a hoot, and I'll probably have to give in and get one with our Minnesota winters upon us.  The girls surprised me by buying me scarves, hats, brush, shampoo and all the other necessities I needed so that all I had to purchase was my wigs.  That was a surprise to me and very emotional.  They are the best and without their love and support, I wouldn't know what to do.  With the wig shopping done we all went to Red Robin Restaurant for a wonderful lunch.  Tomorrow, I have my first chemotherapy sessions.  I am ready to now to take this journey to the "getting better" stage!  Please keep me in your prayers tomorrow.  Thank you!

The Wave .... of emotions

I've been doing so well.  Upbeat, good attitude, good outlook, all of that stuff.  Well, this morning while in the shower getting ready to go to the hospital to have my port put in, a wave of emotion overtook me.  It came out of the blue ... tears .... where it came from and why, I'm not sure.  I think you just need to let it come, cry and be done with it.  After the first wave came, we went to Regions and I had my port put in.  It wasn't painful to have done, but it is not really comfortable now.  I'm sure I'll get used to it after the soreness wears off and it's not so tender.  The process went very smoothly.  I'm glad to have the port in because now I don't need to be a pin cushion anymore.  When they need to take blood from now on, they'll use the port!  Yipee!
After the procedure, we drove home to Cloquet.  Then the second wave hit .... tears again.  Granted, the incisions hurt a little, but not that much.  I guess this rollercoaster will be for a while.  I can do this though, it's not forever.  We do have a fun week planned ahead.  I'm ready to do something FUN!!

Plans Change ........

The best laid plans are often changed.   After relooking at my chemo options, researching the drugs involved and discussing them with some special people (Katie), I have decided to go with Alternative 2 of the chemo plan (the results are equal to Alternative 1, just some different drugs are used).  I will be getting chemo every three weeks for a year.  With our travelling such a long distance, this plan will work better for us and our family.  The best thing is that I do have some control of my treatment.  There were no questions asked when I switched plans.  Today I had a MUGA scan.  After they drew some blood, they took it and I think they added something radioactive to it and put it back in my body and then I had to go to a room with a very narrow bed and lay on it.   A huge camera focused close to my chest and it took pictures of my heart to make sure I could withstand the chemo.  I passed the test, so that's good.  Tomorrow I will have a procedure where they will put a port just below my collar bone, under the skin, and run a tube up to the artery in your neck.  All of it is under your skin.  This port will allow them to just insert the needle for chemo there every time without having to poke into your veins every time you have your session.  I will have to be put under for that, so that's not so exciting.  Michelle, Tom and I attended the chemo classes which were very helpful.  Not so scary now that I know what will happen and where it will take place.  We got to tour the chemo "lounge" ... like you could really lounge there?  My chemo will probably take about 4 1/2 hours the first time and will decrease some after that.  The first time the IV is given slowly so they can monitor how you will tolerate it.  When I got home, I got a call from the lady who did the prothesis and she gave me good news that my insurance would cover more bras and another prothesis!  I made a phone call to "It's Still Me" (a place I can get a wig made ... http://www.itsstillme.com/)  and me and my girls will go for a private session and make a day of trying on wigs and seeing what suits me best.  We're going to bring our cameras so we can scrapbook this day.  I will probably lose my hair by the middle of December and I want to be able to look somewhat nice for the holidays.  Along this journey I have met so many people who have made it easier.  Many, many who have travelled this road ahead of me ................. you just never know when God's going to place someone in your life ... even if it's just for the moment.

Random Thoughts .... my swirling mind

You never know in your life if you "touch" someone ... it just doesn't come up in conversation.  I have to tell you that I have been touched by each and everyone of you by your support and love and most importantly, your prayers.  You never know how much you mean to someone, but I've found that out a thousand times over.  My 7 year old grandson Alex put everything into words that I was thinking when the diagnosis was given me.  "I don't want my Nana to die", "I hate cancer", "Mom, is it okay if I'm sad?", "Mom, is it okay if I'm mad too?"  These are things that run through a 7 year olds' mind, but those exact words were running through my own mind!  "I don't want to die", "I hate cancer", "Is it okay if I'm sad?", "Is it okay if I'm angry?"  How intuitive a child is that they can express what we're thinking?  My granddaughter, Ellie, age 6, touched my heart with a page in her journal that read "I'm so excited, because today my Nana is going to the hospital to get the sickness out!"  Those too were my feelings.  God said, Let the little children come unto me and that we should think like a child.  I can see now why He spoke those words.  They trust, they are innocent and they are very intuitive.  Other random thoughts have run through my head, like .... "Do I really want to go through a year of chemotherapy?"  "What will happen if I don't?"  Well, I can say this, while these thoughts were very real, they weren't an option ... my husband said, "God wouldn't have protected you these past 4 1/2 years and brought you to this point if He didn't think you could go through with this."  And he was right ... why should I even think those thoughts when I've come this far!!  There's still a long way to go and some of my therapy is writing all these feelings down ... it puts things into perspective for me.

The Long Journey Continues ... and I do mean long

Today was a long, hectic day.  We left Cloquet for a 2:00 appointment at Regions with the protheses woman.  That went great!  I got all fitted and it feels so good.  She was amazing.  She took one look at me and reached into her "bag of goodies" and picked it out the first try!  Then, had an appointment with Physical Therapy.  They were happy to see that I had been doing all my exercises and that my range of motion in my arm was so good.  I will continue to do these and soon that arm will be back to normal.  At 4:00 Tom, me, Michelle, Erin, and Wendy went in to the oncologist.  The news was shocking!!!  I'm scared, but I know I can make it through this with God by my side.  Because of the size of the tumor and because there were 2 cancerous lymph nodes, it was a Stage III invasive cancer.   I will begin chemo on Friday, November 19th.  It will be one day of chemo every other week for two months -- that is Part 1.  Next I will have chemo one day a week for 12 weeks -- that is Part 2.  Finally, I will have chemo one day a week every 3 weeks for nine (yes, that is a nine) months -- that is Part 3.    During Part 3 I will simultaneously (at some point) have 6 1/2 weeks of radiation.  When all 3 parts are finished I will begin taking estrogen-blocking pills daily for 5 years.  So, for the next 14 months I'll be having chemo.  Well, let's get this show on the road!!!  The sooner we tackle this, the sooner we'll be done!  Thursday I have to have blood work done and Friday I go have a port put in so they can hook up to the same vein every time.  The port will be under the skin and left there the whole time.  I'm thinking I'd better start looking at some wigs because I'm going to be bald a long time .... who knows, maybe I'll like my new look and keep my head shaved!  :)  Well, I'll be keeping you informed of my progress and please continue the prayers.  Also, if anyone would like to sit with me during a chemo session, I'm sure Tom would love a break and I'd like your company, so let me know.  Love to all of you!  And NOW let's kick some cancer booty!!

God hears prayers .... always.

Today I woke up and felt a feeling of anxiety.  It was time to go find out the pathology results of last week's surgery.  Of course I wanted to know, but also was afraid to know.  Tom and I got drove down to Regions .  Barb at the Breast Care Center went over the pathology report with us right away.  We got the BEST NEWS that we could ever have gotten!  No cancer anywhere.  The lymphnodes they removed were negative with no signs of cancer and where they reopened the breast, there was no cancer.  Everything benign!!!  It's a good thing God had me in His arms because when I heard the news, I actually thought my knees would buckle from relief.  Barb then removed all my drains which were well taken care of by Lori and that was such a relief to have them out.  Barb then gave both Tom and I big hugs.  Still I am in awe.  We then went and scheduled for Tuesday, November 9th an appointment with a woman who will fit me for a prosthesis, an appointment with a physical therapist and an appointment with Dr. J., my oncologist.  He will now figure out the course for the rest of my treatment.  When chemo will start and for how long.  The girls and Tom will all be there for our meeting with Dr. J.  Tuesday will be a busy day.  When we got in the car to go home, I cried tears of joy and couldn't stop thanking God for hearing all of your prayers.  My thanks to all of you is sincere and heartfelt.  I'm only one third of the way to recovery, but with God's and your support I can do this!!!  LOVE TO ALL OF YOU!!

Home again!

Just got out of the hospital this afternoon.  I'm feeling a little weaker than last time, but Dr. Morris said that was to be expected.  They cut open exactly where they cut before, so it's like bruising a bruise.  Other than a little weakness, I feel great.  I have a good appetite and some mighty good pain drugs.  lol.  The surgery went well.  They took out lymph nodes and took out some more skin in the breast area, and Dr. Morris said it looked good.  We, of course, have to wait for the pathology report.  God was with me the whole time and I have never felt so at peace.  How do people do this without their faith?  Remember when I told you about the rainbow when Tom and I drove home to Cloquet?  Well, God is promising again.  When I laid down in my hospital bed, I found a channel that just had music and beautiful nature scenes.  Guess what the first scene was?  A beautiful rainbow!!!!  All I could say was "Thank you God" for your promise.  I know I'll be fine with all these promises and support from everyone!  I must sound like a broken record, but I appreciate your prayers and support more than you'll ever know.  Please keep them coming!  We'll be staying at Erin's house until Wednesday when I get the drains out.  Lori will be helping every a.m. with the dressing and Tom and I will be cleaning the drains 2 times a day.  Just think .... I have passed another hurdle !!  Yippee!!  Tom and I have our anniversary coming up on Friday.  We'll be married 33 years!!  I think a dinner from Applebee's "Carside" is in order!  I can taste the steak already!  Love to all of you ... every night you are in MY prayers, I thank God for you!

Surgery ... bright and early Monday a.m.

I have just been lounging around these last few days.  Love being able to take a shower!  Can't get enough of that.  I called the nurse's hotline today to see if I could take off the steristrips on the masectomy incision and she said I could.  Now ... that's progress.  Get 'em off in time to get new ones on!  lol.  Region's Hospital called with surgery instructions.  I have to BE THERE by 5:30 a.m.  I won't need any anesthetic ... I'll just sleep through it because it's so early in the a.m.  Actually, surgery is at 7:30 a.m. and it will be about a 2 hour procedure.  I'll stay overnight and head home on Tuesday.  Thank you to all who have given me sooooo much encouragement and prayers ... keep 'em coming!!!  I love you guys!  God is good and He hears our prayers.  I'll update you after surgery ... probably Tuesday!  MMwwwwah.  (That's a kiss!)

Surgery ... again.

After consulting with the surgeon today, it was determined that I will have surgery again on Monday, October 25th at 7:30 a.m.  Please send some prayers up to God.  They will be taking out some more lymph nodes.  I have the utmost confidence in my surgeon and when I get through this one, I'll have some time to heal before I start the chemotherapy.  I am looking forward to beginning the healing process.  God will be with me the entire way ... of that I am sure.  Thank you so much for all your prayers and support.  You can't possibly know how much that lifts me up.  I am overwhelmed.

Act Three - Recovering from Surgery

I have been in the best of hands with my sister-in-law, Diane.  We have been doing everything on the "list".  Exercises, walking, draining the tube, changing the dressings ... she is faithful in doing this and making sure I'm doing my part too.  I feel stronger every day.  I had a bit of a "set-back" today when I called the surgeon to reschedule an appt.  3 of the 6 lymph nodes showed cancer.  There may be more lymph nodes taken out and chemo is a "for-sure".  I can't allow myself to get down because with the size of the tumor, that was very likely.  We'll just take one step at a time.  I appreciate all your support and ask that you continually keep me in your prayers.  It is one thing that makes all of this easier.  I know God will give me the strength to face whatever lies ahead ... He's not going to leave my side now .... we've just begun the fight!!!

Act Two - Surgery and Recovery

What a hectic day!  Surgery was scheduled for 4:00 p.m. (10/11) and we were to be at the hospital at 1:00.  I got a call and someone's surgery was cancelled and could I come in for 3:00 surgery instead.  Sure!!  So, I took my shower (and scrubbed the incision site for 5 minutes -- do you know how long that is???) and we hustled down to the hospital.  Boom ... everything went into action.  Dye shot in the breast to highlight the lymph nodes in surgery and then the surgeon is talking to me and then the anethesiologist, then the nurse and then and then and then .... I was in surgery at 2:00 p.m.  All of your prayers must have been going up to God because everything went so well.  The surgery was 2 hours 45 minutes.  I guess the surgeon came out grinning because the lymph nodes they took out all came back (so far) with no cancer in them and the tumor came out just as he planned.  The tumor was 9 centimeters!!!  We will have to wait until Thursday to see if the prognosis on the lymph nodes stays cancer-free.  Keep those prayers coming.  I got back to my room about 7:30 p.m. and Tom, Lori, Wendy, Erin, Toby and Diane were all waiting for me.  How nice it was to be surrounded by loved ones.  Terry came down about 9:00 p.m. and stayed about 1/2 hour.  Everyone was gone by 9:30 and then I tried to sleep.  However the nurse call button on my remote had different ideas.  It kept going off every 8 minutes from 10:00 to 1:00.  Finally they had to have someone come and fix it.  I managed to sleep about 2 hours.  Does anyone ever get any rest in hospitals?  This morning, Lori, Wendy, Erin and Jack came up to visit me with balloons and candy.  The girls all made me a beautiful fleece pink ribbon blanket.  That will keep me cozy warm.  Right now I'm waiting for the dr. to come and discharge me!!  I feel great and keep those prayers coming!!  Thank you!

Act One - Pre-Op Jitters

Well, tomorrow is "show time".  I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little bit nervous.  But, I'm more anxious to get started on the road to recovery than I am nervous of the surgery.  I feel confident with the surgeon and staff at Regions and I know I'll have God by my side.  Tomorrow at this time, I'll have jumped a big hurdle!  Thank you everyone for your support and prayers.  You can't even imagine how much that means to me.  You're the best!

Show Time --- Surgery

Today, October 8, 2010, I went to see another surgeon and this one "clicked" right away.  He made me feel so at ease and was very upbeat about the prognosis.  It's not going to be a picnic, but I didn't suspect it would be.  But, at least we're getting to the "do something about it" stage and not the "how bad is it" stage.  I will be having surgery done Monday, October 11th at 4:00 p.m.  I'm not afraid to do this as I know I will never be alone in this journey.  God will be by my side ..... as he's always been.  Please dear friends, keep me in your prayers?

The Quest for the Best (for me)

Yesterday, October 6, 2010, Tom and I met with the surgeon.  I never really understood the importance of "clicking" with people who have your life in their hands before.  We did not click.  She made me feel more guilty about not coming in sooner (I'm already beating myself up for that one) and then her, "are you allergic to mammograms" remark really turned me off.  She was unprepared and was asking US questions about the MRI and PET scans.  Ummmmmm ........ isn't that their job?  Then, she just didn't seem very confident about removing it and she went on and on and on about reconstructive surgery.  Like if I didn't get this reconstructive surgery I wouldn't be me .......... hello????  My left breast does NOT define WHO I am!!!   To make a long story short, I e-mailed my Oncologist and told him I didn't feel comfortable with her as my surgeon.  He called me this a.m. at 7:50 a.m. to tell me that by all means I should see another surgeon.  I have that right.  And dang it, I'm going to use it!  :)  Someone will be calling me tomorrow to set up an appointment with another surgeon.  I'll either be seeing him tomorrow or first thing next week.  Let's hope the "shoe" fits.

In the Beginning

It started April, 2006 as I was dog-sitting at my daughter Michelle's house.  I was reading a book and had an "itch" on my upper left breast.  I reached down to rub it and felt a lump.  Immediately, my stomach churned and I could feel the blood leave my head.  No .... can't be.  It will go away, it's nothing. I started praying immediately for God to make it go away.  At times it did seem to go away.  Sometimes I could feel it and sometimes not.  Sometimes it felt smaller.  I didn't do anything about that lump until September 2010.  For 4 1/2 years I kept it a secret.  I justified it in my head with "well, I feel fine" or "if it doesn't get bigger in a year (then 2, then 3, then 4), it can't be cancer.  My outlook on life changed ... I looked at every holiday, birthday, vacation, etc. as "this may be my last".  I worried that an accident would happen or I would get sick and have to go to the hospital or doctor and they would discover the lump.  I felt myself being stressed about it more and more often and I continually prayed and bartered with God.     Finally, on September 27th while I was staying with my daughter Erin, when I went to bed, I prayed.  "God, I can't do this anymore ... I give this to you.  Show me what to do."  The next morning I talked to Tom who said I should stop at Wal Mart on the way home and pick up some cat food.  I said  I would and still had no intention of saying anything to anyone.  Well, God had other plans.  I went upstairs and Erin asked if I would like to take Jack home with me for a couple of days so he could get his "nana time".  I immediately burst into tears.  Erin asked what was wrong and I blurted out, "I have a lump!"  I didn't say those words ... God pushed them out of my mouth. 

Erin immediately went into action.  We made a dr. appointment with her doctor in the cities and by that afternoon, I was facing my worst fears.  Michelle dropped everything at work and came to Erin's and the two of them accompanied me to the appointment.  My doctor called down to Region's Hospital and late afternoon, I had a mammogram, ultrasound and biopsy.  When I went into the mammogram, the nurse asked me how I was doing and I started crying.  She gave me time to compose myself and then we proceeded with the tests.  By the time I had the biopsy, I had much time to talk to God.  The doctor left the room to get the biopsys to pathology and when she returned, she said "I don't know what happened from the time you came in here to now, but you seem so at peace."  God's love and peace was visible!!!!! Tom came down to the cities as fast as he could.  Now for the waiting. 

On Wednesday I got the call that the breast was cancerous.  I felt the gambit of emotions!!  I cried, I was angry, I wanted to scream, cry and curl up in a ball at the same time.  I wanted to know why I would win this lottery (8 in 1 chance of developing breast cancer).  The radiologist set up a CT/PET scan, an MRI and bloodwork for Friday.  Tom and I drove home to Cloquet on Wednesday night.  All the way home, I was trying to process what was happening.  I continued to pray ..... constantly.  When we reached our home in Cloquet, it started to rain.  When I went to get out of the car, there was the most beautiful DOUBLE rainbow in the sky.  I immediately started crying .... to me that was God's way of saying "it's going to be all right, I promise."  God used a rainbow for a promise with Noah, why not with me?

On Thursday, we drove down to the cities again and Friday morning Tom, Wendy and Erin accompanied me to the scans.  I went through the scans and faced more fears.  But with God at my side, all the kind people at Regions and the support of my family, my fears were squelched quickly.  Tom and I drove back home to Cloquet.  I had just walked into the house and the phone was ringing.  It was the radiologist and she wanted me to get a biopsy on a lymph node that was "suspect" and tell me the time of my appointment with the oncologist on Monday.  My heart sank again ... the whole gambit of emotions again.  Tom just held me and let me cry.  We cried together and held each other tight.

Saturday morning we awoke to the phone ringing.  I ran down the stairs and it was Erin.  I answered the phone and she said,  "are you ready for some good news?"  And I said I sure could use some.  She said the oncologist had called her (her name was first on the contact list) and said that after looking at the MRI and PET scans and that the cancer was confined to the left breast and not anywhere else in my body. He didn't want me to worry about the results for the whole weekend.  I hung up the phone and shouted thanksgiving to God and ran up the stairs to jump for joy into Tom's arms.  Later that morning, Wendy, Kevin, Erin and Jake came to Cloquet.  The guys worked on the new fence and Wendy and Erin took me to Duluth for a haircut and eyebrow wax.  Wendy even cut her hair into a pixie cut so I wouldn't be the only one with short hair (or no hair when the chemo starts).  They also bought breast cancer t-shirts for themselves, me and Michelle and Lori.

On Monday a.m., Tom, Michelle, Lori, Erin and Wendy and I (us girls with a show of support were wearing our t-shirts) went to meet with the oncologist.  He explained everything so well and everyone got their questions asked and explained to them.  I chose to have a masectomy on the left breast and possibly take out the suspect lymph node at the same time.  The surgery will be followed with chemotherapy (2-5 months) and radiation (33 days, M-Fr for 6 1/2 weeks) and estrogen-blocking drugs for 5 years after that.  Things were looking bright!!!  I had hope!!  Thank you God.  I had to go back to radiology for a biopsy on the suspect lymph node.  After that, it was back to the waiting game.

Today, Tuesday, October 5, 2010 at 4:00 p.m., the pathologist called with the news that there was no cancer in the lymph node!!!!!  Oh my gosh ........................ God is good.  I feel like I'm a walking miracle.  Tomorrow we meet with the surgeon and hopefully, we'll know more about treatment.  Like, how long chemo will have to be, etc. 

I think God has a plan for me ........... I better listen carefully ............ I want to do and be who God wants me to be.